There’s a point in every relationship where you just know that it’s time to give up. It’s time to let go. It’s time to move on. You’ve been fighting for it, contending for it, but at some point, you come into terms with the futility of it all, and you have to stand back and watch the friendship die.

    It may be your fault. It may be your friend’s (or ex-friend’s). It doesn’t really matter anymore. The friendship is dead. Grieve, because you lost something loved and precious.

    R.I.P. Friendship

    I found myself in tears this morning, because I realized that a friendship I’d been praying would get restored had finally hit the dust.

    I felt like I did everything I was capable of doing or knew how to do in order to reach full restoration, and there were times when true reconciliation seemed to be within grasp, but circumstances, people and I guess our own pride and personal issues kept pulling us apart.

    For seven months, God taught me a lesson in love, trust, friendship and the power of words that I wouldn’t soon forget. I know that God sees both our hearts, that we both long and cry out for unity and love, but I guess some things are truly just beyond our control, and we just have to let go and let God.

    I Tried to Hold Your Hand, but You’d Rather Hold Your Grudge

    There’s the temptation to blame the person, to point my finger at her and tell her that she killed the friendship, but I know that’s not true. We both did it. We stabbed that friendship to death with our pride, attitude, ignorance and words.

    Words kill. Words give life. They’re either poison or fruit. You choose. – Proverbs 18:21

    Our words killed the friendship and we’re both guilty. I’m guilty. I said things I shouldn’t have said, done things I shouldn’t have done.

    Apologies have been made, but grudges have been kept. It’s a dead end, a deadlock. That’s just the way it is.

    Of course not. We’re Christians.

    That’s just the way it is?! What?! Of course not!

    Real wisdom, God’s wisdom, begins with a holy life and is characterized by getting along with others. It is gentle and reasonable, overflowing with mercy and blessings, not hot one day and cold the next, not two-faced. You can develop a healthy, robust community that lives right with God and enjoy its results only if you do the hard work of getting along with each other, treating each other with dignity and honor. James 3:17-18 (The MSG)

    So yeah. The friendship is dead, but that doesn’t mean the fight is over. It’s far from over. We’re Christians for crying out loud. Death has lost its power. I fully expect this friendship to resurrect at some point, because we have eternal, resurrection life in Christ!

    But for now… we just have to trust that God is in control, that we’re works in progress and that we’re growing in grace. We have to believe that all the prayers lifted up on behalf of the friendship were heard by the omnipotent God. Even now, He has plans to breathe life into every dead relationship.

    Until then, rest in peace, friendship.

    Rest In Peace.

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    Joanna Alonzo

    Author/Founder at Almond Tree Publications
    Joanna Alonzo is a walking paradox. She is a beautiful, albeit messy, mixture of thought and emotion, expressed in the form of hopefully readable – and relatable – stories. She is a kingdom kid, who looks forward to being a writer and storyteller even when she reaches heaven. She is passionate about the unreached, about those who have yet to know the Love she found in the arms of the Almighty. She is intrigued by the world and its people, who day by day, continue to convince her that God is the greatest Storyteller of all.
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